I got mad at my son last night and I feel badly about it. It was 1:30 am in my defense, but I still shouldn't have gotten mad.
He's been having troubles sleeping lately. He thinks a lot about stuff that happened during the day as he's trying to go to sleep. Sometimes it's happy stuff and sometimes it's stuff that upset him. I used to let him listen to an audio book, but that had the opposite effect. He'd still be awake at 10:30 or even 11:00 at night. Then we tried soft music, but still he stayed awake. Finally, we got him a CD with the sounds of the ocean and that seems to have helped. He's also waking through the night, though. He says he's scared of ghosts or noises that he hears and the only way he seems to be able to fall back to sleep is if I lie with him. He comes into our room at all hours and announces that he can't sleep. Usually, I just groggily stumble to his room and lie down with him. Soon we're both asleep. Then I wake an hour later and go back to my bed. Last night, in my groggy still half asleep state, I decided to tell him that he has to try and go back to sleep on his own.
I don't mind lying down with the kids in their beds once in awhile, or having them come to our bed from to time, but I was beginning to see a long standing habit forming. I know some people may think I'm being selfish, but I don't want my sleep interrupted every night. I get pretty bitchy when I'm tired.
So, for some reason I thought it was a good idea to take a stand at 1:30 in the morning. I told him that he'd have to try and go back to sleep on his own tonight. He started to complain and I got angry. I did lie down, but I snapped that this was the last night. By morning I felt pretty crappy about it, and I apologized to him. I said that, of course, he can come to mommy if he's scared in the night, but we still need to think of something to help him go back to sleep on his own. For now, we've suggested that he turn on his ocean sounds if he needs them.
Anyone going or did go through this with their children? Suggestions?
4 comments:
Yep just went through this with my Haley ...except we would find our daughter in our bed every morning...she'd sneak in and slip in bed with us. I didn't mind it so much...but it started to interfere with Jeremy's sleep...and since he has to get up early and work we had to put a stop to it.
3 things really worked for Haley. The first was grandma got her a fish lamp. You turn it on and fish are swimming in it. It looks like an aquarium and glows nicely in her room. The second thing was Jim Weis CD's. Which might not work for you since you mentioned the stories on CD had the opposite effect...The third thing that really did was in her Daisy group she needed to earn her bravery pedal and she decided sleeping in her own room all night was a very brave thing to do.
Maybe you can make a chart for nights he stays in bed all night long and work towards an incentive or something.
I can understand you getting grumpy from being woken up...I don't like not getting enough sleep and if I get woken up I have a hard time sleeping good the rest of the night.
It's a stage that will soon get over with though...Haley hasn't woken me up for 3 or 4 months now.
Wow this got long!
Thanks for your comment, Heather.
The fish lamp thing sounds like a good idea. I think I've seen ones with stars or planets or something on them. The chart might work, too, but if he's genuinely scared - I'm not so sure.
We love Jim Weiss. We listen to him during the day, but it might engage him too much at night.
Thanks again for the great suggestions. :)
Don't beat yourself up about it Debbie. Moms are entitled to lose it once in awhile at 1:30 in the morning. I know its happened to me with Joshua. You appoligized so he knows you aren't angry. But you are not being selfish about wanting your sleep.
You are doing the right thing. They have to learn to deal with it...with your support...not you doing it for him. If he wants to talk about it then talk in the middle of the night...but he has to learn to go to bed by himself...and soon he will. We went through it for a while too and we laid in bed at first too...but it was shortened and shortened until it was "good night".
Post a Comment